Expect the Expected, AKA "Duh"

I hate the term “Expect the unexpected” because seriously, if it’s unexpected, how do you know what to expect?

But if something is expected, maybe you should sorta, I don’t know, expect it?

Remember a few months ago, when I was first diagnosed with my connective tissue disorder, how I said that usually ballet and this condition aren’t perfectly aligned, but if you watch yourself and do it properly, you should be okay? If you do remember that, you are the only ones. Because I, in a last ditch attempt to keep the fantasy alive, certainly haven’t been remembering this. Well, not on a conscious level at least.

I do think somewhere deep inside I have been aware. And to be honest, a little scared that I was denying the truth. But, anyways…

It has been a week and a half since my class and I’m still recovering. I have been quite fatigued, which I find very frustrating. And I have some EDS-ish things going on which have me feeling a little nervous. What are EDS-ish things? You probably don’t want to know, but for those who might have EDS and be wondering about the EDS/ballet connection, here it is…

For me, the following have been happening just recently:
– My hips are subluxating (almost dislocating) more. This is happening a lot DURING ballet class/exercises now, which never used to happen.
– The backs of my ankles/Achilles area is sore more now.
– My shoulders are popping A LOT. Now can’t roll over in bed at night without them popping/cracking.
– I seem to have torn a muscle in my thigh. So much I can’t do with it. Hurts and knots up a lot.

These are, of course, all signs that I have overextended myself. Literally. I knew I would get to a place with ballet where I would need to understand my body’s healthy extension more, and that time has definitely come. But it’s not as easy to find out as I would have liked. If you can extend, you tend to think that you should. But if you can only really extend that far because faulty connective tissue that is weak is letting you extend past a healthy place — because its weak little cells, can’t hold you back, then that’s not really a proper healthy extension. Am I making sense?

My shoulders worry me. I am lucky that they don’t dislocate at the moment, and haven’t dislocated in my life. But with all the cracking and popping now, that is clearly coming from trying my hardest to pull my shoulders lower and extended out in ballet, the connective tissue in the should joint is clearly becoming weaker and I worry that it will start to dislocate. That’s the kind of stuff I’m way into avoiding. Hips and knees going out is bad enough, don’t need to add shoulders to that list, no thanks.

Anyway. It’s complicated. I need to let my body heal and at the same time think about what’s going on in my body during ballet.

It feels like I am sitting the ‘How Much Do You Know About Doing Ballet with EDS?’ exam at the moment. And I have realised that I have some more study to do. So off I go. Study, study, study.

On a practical note, for now I have decided that I will alternate ballet classes with walking, so I am doing ballet every second day and strengthening my thigh and calf muscles and cardio with walking on the other days. I’m looking forward to this. We have such beautiful land to walk on.

And I will be watching my extensions during ballet very closely. Well, actually I will be making sure I DON’T fully extend during class. So as to give my joints a break while I try to figure out what is happening. There is a lot that I cannot do at the moment anyway, so it’s a pretty basic class.

Just generally, everything is pretty quiet here at the moment. My Angel One (eldest daughter) still isn’t doing too well. Poor chook is back to no activities and wearing lots of joints straps/braces to help ease her pain.

The chiropractor helped some, but it hasn’t really eased her pain much. The things that we thought were out in her spine and hips, were out, so it’s good to get confirmation that our gut feelings on this are mostly accurate. But she is still in a fair bit of pain to sit, stand, walk, or basically do anything.

But we are all doing our usual family fun stuff. Lots of board games and movies this weekend.

I hope you all enjoy the upcoming weekend. It’s Saturday morning here and it’s beautiful. We are hoping for some rain and the clouds are looking promising.